Feb 8, 2007

Flogging one oh one

As the awards season roll around, I can’t help but feel a little left out. Even our dismal excuse for an ‘Indian blogosphere’ seems to sycophantically celebrate the achievements in the blogosphere (what an inane word) by handing out awards incestuously, to the same group of so called ‘elite’ Indian male bloggers year after year with infinitesimal changes from one year to the next.

What we at flog the blog strive to do is to not ‘shine’ a spotlight on lesser known blogs. Don’t expect that kind of weepalicious charity cow-feces here. We will follow the herd of ‘elite’ Indian male blogger grovel-ers and amiably bow to their god-like status in the ‘blogosphere’ and dedicate a whole set of awards (to them) formulated from our own irreverent ideas.

So without further ado, we present to you...

THE INDIFLOGGIES!

Categories include:

Most undersexed award of the year (aka the award to fight tooth and nail for)

-Phony braggadocio award.

-Dukhi Atma of the year award.

-Blog post that made you want to torch the Blogger HQ award.

-Blogger most likely to not have interacted with the female of the species ever, except for his mother award.

-Most bereft of all rhyme or reason blogger aka surefire candidate for the assisted living facility award.

-Most compelling case against free speech award.

- The Dilip Kumar award for the most exhaustive use of blogger and wordpress server space.

If you still have a hard time wrapping your mind around the idea that these awards are reserved ONLY FOR THE MEN or if you are afflicted with a severe case of ADD then I will repeat: These awards are only reserved for the divine male Indian ‘elite’ bloggers.

Nominations are welcome.

[scroll down for the Hindi version, for those of you who refuse to associate yourselves with everything un-desi, including the English language]

33 comments:

Micky "bullet" McGee said...

Ooooooo!!! Lookie here!! I just stumbled on the indi-razzies "blogworld" edition! Let me get stuck in right away!!!!

"Most undersexed award of the year (aka the award to fight tooth and nail for)" - Vulturo (Suckit Vaidya?)

"Phony braggadocio award. " - Krish from Krishworld.com

"Dukhi Atma of the year award." -

"Blog post that made you want to torch the Blogger HQ award." - Multiple nominations!!! Vulturo (wordpress, I know, but what the hell?), Sakshi (Vulturo's muppet).

"Blogger most likely to not have interacted with the female of the species ever, except for his mother award." - Umm... Vulturo for a sweep?

"-Most bereft of all rhyme or reason blogger aka surefire candidate for the assisted living facility award." - KRISH!!!!!

"Most compelling case against free speech award." - Vulturo, Sakshi, Krish, Confused and the great Patrix himself! (Are we seeing a pattern here?)

"The Dilip Kumar award for the most exhaustive use of blogger and wordpress server space." - If we are talking waste of space, Amit Varma for his multiple (YAWN! BORING!) blogs and Vulturo purely for his existence.



P.S : I yam furst commenter! I want award!! Actually, scratch that.. I want to present an award!!

KK said...

I suppose Amit Varma is a surefire contender for the following :-

-Most compelling case against free speech award.

- The Dilip Kumar award for the most exhaustive use of blogger and wordpress server space


I mean its amazing, that a Cricket Columnist ( with probably an Economics degree - to be charitable to him ) writes with such unassailable knowledge ( bereft of any personal Experience I'm sure :) that -

The fact that markets aren't zero-sum, for example, or that the spontaneous order of millions of individuals working separately towards their self-interest can produce and distribute goods far more efficiently than central planning can.

and some more, for the sake of example :-

How can free speech thrive in a country where giving offence is treated as a crime?

( Now we are supposed to genuflect to a New Sacred Cow - that of "Free Speech" ... )

Anonymous said...

As long as you keep Falstaff out of this, I am okay. Totally love that man. All others can burn in hell!

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Mickey "bullet" mcgee:

Some one loves the psychotic vulture here!

Did you realize that the above statement was supposed to be "tongue in cheek". I cant beat the master though.

@ KK:

We feel your pain.

@ Anonymous:

Sorry Falstaff lover. We cant leave his holiness out of this.

Falstaff said...

Please ignore anonymous. I refuse to be left out of this. Can I claim Poi-tre as being part of the wordpress server space I waste even though I have a female co-blogger?

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Falstaff:

Rest assured, we will NEVER ignore you, your holiness.

Blade Bakkiri said...

My dear ammu, you are making very many typos..Surely, that should read "Falstaff, your arse-hole-ness", shouldn't it?

Vaijayanthi Ben said...

Micky Mcgee,

Aap bahut natkhat hain.. agar mere pateedev ki nazar kaheen aur hotee to main aapko.....

*sharmeelee hasee*

tauba tauba.. main bhi naa..isshhhh

Micky "bullet" McGee said...

Ms. Ben,
Let us just say we are flattered - as flattered as a pancake that went under a steam roller - and we are glad. Anything else we can do around here?

KK said...

Mcgee...

Thanks for the reference to Mr Krish. I second your nominations ... especially the Rhyme/Reason wallah.

Anonymous said...

I want Gaurav Sabnis to win all of the awards. Please.

Also please include women. Rashmi Yawn Bansal, Sakshi Juneja.

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ KK:

Oh Krish will be one of the main contenders, dont you worry. But our dream here is to see Krish win the "Indibloggies" as well. He is the MAN of the hour after all.

@ Anonymous:

But of course! How can we not include Mr. fake libertarian in our nominations? That would be blasphemy.

Sakshi said...

Ah! I feel so wanted.. * Blushing with Joy *...so much love. Oh! Lord I ain't worthy.....

But I guess free PR work has never harmed anyone....so yes people bring on the awards. :)

Subas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cosmic Voices said...

Hilarious. But why such few nominations?

Anyways, I nominate myself for "Most undersexed", "Dukhi atma", "Blogger most likely to not have interacted with the female of the species ever."

Please give me some award no..please please...

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Sakshi:

Dont delude yourself. These awards have nothing to do with you. Now run off and bring us some men.

@ cosmic voices:

Really now? Self nominations? Why so eager? We'll review your blog and see. If its awful enough, consider yourself nominated!

Anonymous said...

I demand that you include women too, leave yourselves out but do include other women.

Anonymous said...

The only half decent male Blogger is Samit Basu and the worst is of course Greatbong. Can we have a worst Bong Blogger category?

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Anonymous 1:

We will first tackle the men before moving on to the women.

@ Anonymous 2:

Regional categories will be added, of course.

Gautam Ghosh said...

I'm not a "divine" or "elite" blogger, but can you check my blog out ?

Anonymous said...

Phony braggadocio award: compulsive confessor!!!! she's bragged like men do, about their sexual contests, so stands a big chance to win this one!

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Gautham Ghosh:

I need to sleep on that one.

@ Anonymous:

What part of 'these awards are reserved only for the men' dont you understand? On the other hand, if women were included I think she would sweep that category, hands down.

Anonymous said...

cow hater ammu: so why havent y'all included women? Its sad to see that you're giving the much touted 'equal opportunity' a go by. Not fair at all! we just lost the chance for some serious bitchslapping.

I agree with the nomination for compulsive confessor in bragging - if someone was to read her posts in a word document without knowing that its a woman, they'd think it was some teenage fratprat obsessed with sex and conquests and free entries to clubs.

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Anonymous jee:

We at flog the blog are horrible proponents of 'equal opputunity'. Hell, we actively propogate male bashing!If you actually scrolled up a little bit, you would take care to note that I have clearly mentioned in a previous comment that we will tackle the women after the men. So run along now and stop whining about the exclusion of women.

Vaijayanthi Ben said...

OMG.. worst bong blogger= BONGER?

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Vaijayanthi Ben:

Namaskaram ben! And OMG I think we have our new category!

Sakshi said...

Oh Mighty Cow Hater Ammu...

I apologise for jumping to conclusions here. I guess a few minute comment mentions got my head spinning...

Anyways kindly forgive and pls do consider Me and My Blog for the women awards..as and when it happens.

Now as you wished...I bugger Off.

Melody said...

Lovely!!! Just came by here today! Am so impressed!!

Until you include us women who deserved to be flogged as well, I propose we rename this awards section to:
(01) We want men only - the Homo IndiFloggies
(02) We don't want women yet - the Sexist Indifloggies

Cow hater Ammu said...

@ Sakshi jee:

Vanakkam Sakshi jee and dont apologise, we always support the womenfolk here! Now how about getting us some men for real this time, hmm?

@ Melody jee:

Oh Melody jee, we are not the gatekeepers of political correctness here, no? So we will simply call our awards the Indifloggies. But we are romba romba happy to have you visit us!

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